Please bear with me Dear Reader. This particular blog post is not exactly a Dharma moment. There is no deep reflection, no further questions to pursue, no moral to the story. This is just a little context that I think it is important for you to be aware of before we launch into the New York saga.

I had been pretty happy in San Francisco for many years. But my husband, Eric, struggled with his job and was looking for an exit. When he got a call to interview at a NY company we were psyched. We both went to NY for the interview and used the opportunity to poke around, check-out houses and neighborhoods, see if it would be a good new home for us.

The truth is, the warning signs were already there: I registered how dirty, loud and crowded the city was. I had the thought that we should set aside some of the money we would use on a NY house to also buy a ‘country cottage’ so we could getaway on weekend (i.e. I was thinking about escaping before I ever arrived). I knew from friends, articles, my own 6 month-pre-grad school NY living experience, that NY could be a hard place to live. But I though we were special — I thought money, feeling ‘grounded’, age, wisdom, good karma,  even my Dharma practice and the tools it had taught me, gave us an edge, if not a guarantee, then at least some advantage, that it would all be OK…

Plus, we were getting a bit tired of San Fran: The homelessness, the drug use on the streets, the expense, the traffic, the new breed of tech douchebags bros that  had invaded the city, the crime…it just wasn’t as cool as it used to be. That is part of the reason why, even though Eric actually had another job offer at an SF -based company, we decided we would move and try our luck in NY.  There were other reasons too..I was feeling bored at my job and moving made for an easy transition. I was feeling restless, like I wanted to try new things, to meet new people, to build a new life and identity elsewhere.  So there it is Dear Reader, an important detail I want you to know –we had a choice — we could have stayed, but we decided to go.

In my mind, I imagined New York would be an awesome new adventure. I had fantasies about the days I would spend at the galleries and the nights watching shows on Broadway. Chic, hip Eric and Alana and our chic new NY friends. When our bid on the ‘perfect house’ (a cool, old skool, downtown loft)  that we had seen on our initial interview trip was accepted even more fuel was added to the fantasy fire –a home-base in our new home, a place to nest and feel safe, a perfect lover’s pod, to come back to at night after our days of fun-filled explorations of ‘The Greatest City on Earth’.

When I left SF for NY, I left feeling confident that I had made a good decision about moving.  So many times I had moved before and never had I felt so ‘sure’, so secure, so hopeful for what I ‘knew’ would be a happily ever after. Sadly My Friends, we are at the start of this story and definitely not at a happy ending. So stay tuned for those ‘NY adventures ‘ that I most definitely wasn’t prepared for.