With the boxes all put away and the final design elements being put on our new home I remembered an old plant that I used to have that would have looked nice in the house, it was an orchid. An orchid that had thrived so well in a sunny spot on my desk and then died, quite quickly, when it had shifted just a few inches to the left, out of the direct sun.

Suddenly it hit me, one of the deepest wrong views underlying my decision to move in the first place: Alana is a special little flower. You see, my orchid had shown me a deep truth of this world — everything single thing is subject to its environment, its circumstances, its factor/conditions/causes.  But, I ignored that plants’ great teaching moment. So, when Eric got his job offer in NY I simply took for granted that happy, cheery, settled and stable Alana could move (a hell of a lot more than a few inches mind you) and things, I, would be exactly the same. You see orchids may be subject to their environment but I believed I  was a special little flower, exempt from the influences of this world.

Had I actually understood this great life lesson before I moved, I can’t say for sure we wouldn’t have gone, but I certainly would have thought about it a lot more critically. I wouldn’t have been so blind in my decision making and blindsided by the result. The truth is, I had evidence way beyond botany; I had moved almost 10 times in the past and each one was a struggle to adjust, a loss of my sense of identity, some were downright despairing. But I ignored so many warnings, the basic truth of this world (impermanence), and I skipped off into a sunset that ended-up leading to many long and dark days in Gotham.